Saturday, September 30, 2006

Talking in the midst of songs

For unknown reasons, some artists find it interesting to add spoken dialogue to their songs. I guess it must work sometimes, but mostly it feels as if you were peacefully listening to a song when somebody decided to walk in and start talking his mouth off. You're like, "Shut up! I'm listening to a song here!" But you can't shush them, they're part of the very song you're listening to! It's truly maddening. I like my songs to be, you know, sung. Is that too much to ask?

Friday, September 29, 2006

My humor

I was thinking about my sense of humor today. This is what I came up with.

1. I am a fan of the non sequitur. It's basically saying a phrase that has no relation whatsoever with everything said up to that point. I love its potential for shock, which is a really cool way of making jokes.

-So what are you gonna be doing today?
-Killing a South African President. You?

It's the kind of humor that gets you labeled as 'weird' really fast.

2. Another favorite humoristic tool of mine: the double entendre. It's saying one thing while meaning another.

-People should just let me do my thing!
-If you decide to do your thing, remember the K-Y Jelly.

The audience has got to be really sharp for that one. Most people aren't.

3. The hyperbole. Man, I can't live without that one. It's taking something ordinary and making it huge. Jhohen Vasquez used it a lot in Invader Zim.

Blogging: a serious matter

It's a bit frustrating, you know?

For every anecdote you see in my blog, there's four or five that aren't there.

There's lots of stuff that should be immortalized in a blog entry, but it's practically impossible to be able to put it all in.

First of all, there's the stuff I forget. And then there's a ton of stories that don't make the cut because, simply put, the writing process is hard. Believe it or not, it's a bit exhausting to sit in front of the 'puter, organize my thoughts and write it all down. I mean, it can take me about 30 minutes or more to write (an rewrite) a single post. No, I'm not a slow typist, more of a slow thinker. I just don't have the energy, nor the time. So I have to prioritize. I have to choose which stuff needs to be told, and which is kept under wraps for a while, maybe forever.

And here you thought blogging was piece of cake.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

David Duchovny would feel right at home

My blog reminds me of the X-Files.

No, my sister wasn't abducted by aliens, and I don't have a hot redhead as my coworker. The comparison goes like this: X-Files had two types of episodes. The 'monster of the week' episodes were very approachable, didn't require any previous knowledge of the series, and could be watched in any desired order, as they did not have continuity (By the way, I loved those.).

The 'aliens story arc' episodes were a bit more complex and were kind of difficult to watch, as they involved a lot of mandatory previous knowledge of the series. And you had to watch them in a set order or you wouldn't understand a thing.

Now, my blog has two kinds of posts as well. The 'Wacky World of KZ' posts feature my comments on issues ranging from the obscure to the profane. Anybody can read them. Guys with ADD love them.

The 'KZ's Life' posts are a bit more difficult to follow, as many require a bit of previous reading. I try to link back to previous posts to make things a bit more understandable. They are also drenched in drama.

Can you tell which kind is the next post?

Robert Palmer, Where Art Thou?

They don't make videos like this. I'm talking about Robert Palmer's Simply Irresistible. What a video. It wasn't an original concept, just a bigger and better version of Addicted to Love, but who cares? It was totally awesome. The Addicted girls weren't all that good looking. But the video guys outdid themselves with Simply. I mean, the sight of so many gorgeous ladies, moving like beautifully made robots... Unforgettable.

A fact worth mentioning is that despite the total lack of nudity or obscenity in it, this video is one of the most erotic things I've seen. Fellows, wouldn't you agree?

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Sad stories suck

SPOILER ALERT: In this post I will talk about the plots of two movies. Don't read on if you dislike being told how a movie is gonna end.

I don't really like sad stories. I like to avoid them as much as possible. But sometimes they come at you out of nowhere.

There's this very talented young lady down at YouTube, who calls herself Joyride13. She makes little videos where she sings like an angel. One of such vids was a cover of Only Hope, which happens to be a song that Mandy Moore sings in the 2002 film A Walk To Remember. Curious as I am, I headed to Wikipedia to know more about the film. Here's the short version: Boy meets girl, they fall in love, girl gets sick, boy and girl get married, girl dies.

Why does it sound so familiar? Oh yeah, because that's my story.

By now, you probably know that I lost my fiancee Ivy almost a year ago to a terminal illness. So this kind of stories really get to me. Really.

Back in 2001, Ivy and I went to see Sweet November, which has pretty much the exact same plot as the aforemented picture. I already knew by then that Ivy was really sick, but I hoped that the illness would be controlled and she could lead a normal life. Her whole illness had me worried, but I tried to bury it down within.

However, seeing Charlize Theron get sicker and sicker onscreen was too much to bear. I had a sudden flash of myself in the Keanu role, staring Death in the face. All my fear, all my anguish, everything that I had managed to repress came out through my tearducts in an efervesent manner. I had to step out of the theater, to sob my heart out. When I came back, Ivy asked me what was wrong, and I just made up some stupid thing to cover it up. I mean, I wasn't about to tell her, 'I am really afraid that you may die on me.'

As I was reading the synopsis for A Walk To Remember, I was overcome with sorrow and pain in less than a second. Before I could realize it, I was sobbing again. Personally, I find it amazing how a few words had such an impact upon me. I mean, with Sweet November, I was seeing it on the screen. But this was just reading. I guess the difference is that I now have some deeply embedded imagery inside of me, which the words managed to stir up.

I guess what really moved me was the fact that Mandy Moore's character knew she was gonna die, and had made a To Do list, which was fulfilled by her loved one, played by Shane West. The last item on her list? Getting married, which they did shortely before she passed away.

Ivy wanted to get married too. She wanted to have kids. But I couldn't give any of that to her. We just didn't have enough time. We just... didn't.

I'm sorry, baby. I really am. Please forgive me.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Let's wait a bit

I keep forgetting that getting a worthwhile girl is gonna take lots of time. I have to change a lot internally and externally before I can get a girl. I need to improve my approach, my confidence. I also need to take better care of myself. But I lack the motivation. It feels as if it is an impossible quest.

I need to be patient. I need to wait till the time is right.
Relax, KZ... can you do that?

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Marriage and fatherhood angst

I really want to be a husband and a father. But should I?
Maybe I'd be doing the world a favor by not procreating.
And marrying some poor girl seems like the cruelest thing I could ever do.

Yeah, I'm being melodramatic, but I'm feeling kinda down.

And right now, it does feel like I'm asking for more than I'm entitled to, like I don't really deserve to be married and have kids. I'll tell you this: If I am to be a lousy father and a crappy husband, I would rather just forget the whole thing.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Kz the barbarian

Bruce, as the kind friend he is, was gentle enough to point out how rude I am. At first I didn't want to acknowledge it, but he started to mention a lot of examples: I cut in front of old folks. I didn't greet people. When we got to his granny's house, I grabbed a fork without asking for it and made a mess without moving a muscle to clean up.

Am I a total savage? Perhaps.

Personally, I like to think that Bruce is just too judgemental.

At last!

When Daft Punk put out their 'Discovery' album, they hired Japanese animation artist Leiji Matsumoto to do the videos. In total, they did 14 videos which come together as a small mini-movie, called INTERSTELLA 5555: THE 5TORY OF THE 5ECRET 5TAR 5YSTEM

Even though it was released in 2003, only now was I able to watch it as a whole after piecing it together in YouTube. You can check it out here.

Bruce doesn't like my Friends

I've been friends with Bruce for over 25 years. We are very different, him and me. He was always athletically inclined, whereas I always looked forward to the relaxation of a good couch. He loves wrestling, and cars. I like computers and manga. Sometimes I wonder how we have been friends for so long.

Our latest point of conflict: Friends. He hates the show, whereas my sisters and I love it. Bruce says it's poorly written and badly acted. While I can't defend every single episode, I can tell you this: it's fun! I even have the theme song in my iTunes. I love the show so much that I plan to acquire, over time, the whole ten seasons on DVD.

Of course, Bruce would rather drive a hot iron into his eyeballs first.

Don't like it? There's the door

Turns out lonelygirl15 was fake after all. The writers behind her captivating story came out last week. And Jessica Rose, the actress portraying lonelygirl, appeared on Leno on the 14th. Some people were offended, feeling that they were duped. We were. But I don't care. LG15's story is quite interesting, and frankly, Jess looks really hot. So I'll keep tuning in, as lots of people have decided to.

So what's the deal with people still posting negative comments about her on YouTube?

Back when it wasn't clear if LG15 was fake or not, lots of self-appointed 'defenders of the truth' felt it necessary to warn us, poor boobs, about how obvious it was that LG15 wasn't real. 'She is a #$"& fake' they wrote, as if adding an expletive to their statement would cement it in truth. Come on. I am not a baby, and I think I have a fairly-sized IQ. So I don't need a nanny to tell me what I should and shouldn't be watching.

Back to the present. The morons insist on writing comments like 'I hate this crap', and 'It's so boring'... yet they keep coming back to LG15, never missing a single episode. It's a free world, guys. If you don't like something, you can go elsewhere. There's thousands of channels to choose from. No need to fill our air your with noxious gas, you brainless windbags.

Friday, September 15, 2006


I am starting to think about moving on. And for the first time since Ivy's gone, I've found somebody whom I might like, but most importantly, she's somebody who might like me back.

I'm afraid. It feels so good to fall back upon the twisted web of Love. But is it too soon? Should I wait till it's been a year? I'm a mess.


Driving back home was a nightmare. The streets were crowded because tomorrow is Kzanderallia Day. People travel to the city to light torches with the 'Fire of Freedom' and they head back on foot to their respective towns to light their own respective Fires of Freedom. As a result, there's people with torches running around all over the place.

As I contemplated the runners from the safe confines of my vehicle, I could do nothing but yearn for a time when I believed in something with so much vigor. I can think of nothing that would make me run for miles carrying a torch. And yet these people do it, without minding the weather, the tiredness, the pain.

I want to believe in something too. I just can't think of anything right now.

'Just' a comment

I recently watched Radiohead's 'Just' video. Even though the damn thing was made back in 1995, it still creeps me out. A man lying on the street, for no apparent reason. He refuses to explain himself, and when he does, everyone around him immediately lays down on the street as well. What did the guy say? What could make people react that way? I shiver trying to come up with an answer. It's been 11 years and I still haven't found it.

Happy Kzanderallia Day!

Today's Kzanderallia Day. Hurray!

Saturday, September 09, 2006

So far, so good

My mood is fine. I seem to be doing real well, no depressions, no issues. Cool sailing.
This should be a busy, busy weekend. I have to finish Phase One of my graduation project this very weekend. And Phase Two has to be done in a couple of weeks. I believe I can do this. But I do have to write down what I have to do, because I have a tendency to wander and so a list will help me. I can do this. I can do this. I just have to plan accordingly.

Hey, where's everybody???

It seems everybody chose this weekend to get out of the country.

My mom and my sister left for the US to go see my sister Luann for three weeks. During that time, they plan to go to Lourdes (France) and dip my lil' sister in the (reputedly) medicinal waters.

Ivy's parents, brother Hughes, sister Ally and another sister, Steph, will be going to Mexico for the weekend.

So what this means is that it'll be just me and my granma. Quality time, at last!

Friday, September 01, 2006

Xanadu Weekend

Rossenthal's a cool guy. He was going to Xanadu to see Donny. He knew I wanted to come as well, so he waited for me. This is specially generous since it's a four hour drive and the trip gets kinda dangerous at night. But Ross's a great driver, he knows the road and we got there safely.

I believe I've mentioned Donny before. He's a former Design classmate. He has his own design studio in Xanadu. I had several reasons to go see him. For instance, I hadn't seen him in nine months. The last time I saw him was when Id dropped him off at the airport when he took off for Europe with his girl. The other reason for going to see him was that I needed his help with with Phase One of my graduation project, which is a Flash portfolio. (I promise to share it once it's finished.)

Donny and I have a special kind of friendship. After college, we have remained close even though we only see each other a couple of times a year.

Donny and I worked on my project for hours. Then he asked me for help on a project of his, which we worked on for ten hours straight. We started working on it around 10 PM and finished around 8 AM next day. When we finished, I didn't want to see even a tiny speck of HTML again.

Even though it was a labor-intensive weekend, we still managed to have a great time. I totally love Donny's family. They're very loving, funny and relaxed. I hope to go see them again really soon.