Friday, December 29, 2006

Talk about awkward

It's been almost a week since I asked Addie to be my girl and got rejected. I thought I could handle it, and I have, but it's been really tough.

I wanted things to be the same as they were. Yeah, I was that naive.

Now I realize that normalcy will be almost impossible. Addie and I have crossed a line which usually botches up many a friendship. Our relationship has lost its balance and now it's an ugly mess.

I can't treat her like I used to do before. Whenever I try to be as friendly as I used to, I find myself feeling awkward. It's like I'm angry at her for rejecting me, and that anger is blocking all my positive feelings toward her.

I don't hate her. After all, she did me a favour by turning me down if she wasn't interested. But she did hurt me, so there's a part of me that resents her.

All this awkwardness wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that she and I work in the same environment, so I keep running into her every five minutes. Talk about a dumb predicament.

I think I will survive. My friendship with Addie, however, may not.

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